Is this slander and defamation?

talked to mutual "friend" - he then told his wife, who is cheating on him with my soon to be ex husband some things that i had said in confidentiality - he not only said these things but blew them out of proportion. so wife, told my soon to be ex and soon to be ex, called and told my mother - is this defamation or slander? since i said some things to mutual friend and it got to soon to be ex? i said it was told in confidentiality but mutual friend still spilled the beans and tattled - which then my mom calls me to tell me that soon to be ex is upset that i told mutual friend what i did.